Thursday, 4 June 2009

I've stopped beating myself up

The biggest difference in my life these days is that I've stopped beating myself up about everything. You know that little stick we carry aound with us to beat ourselves up with? Well, I've thrown it away. Today I tend to accept the way I feel; the way I think; and the way I am. I am perfect in every way.

In my drinking days I always wanted to be something I was not. Basically, therefore, I was living a lie (and everyone who's ever lied knows how painful that can be); I was not true to nature. Today, you see, I've become comfortable just being me.

I used to phone up my sponsor – some difficulty, some script or other not working out as it should – and he’d tell me, “The trouble with you, Wynford, is that you keep forgetting that you’re a genius!”

And, yes, I’d laugh much as I imagine you are laughing now. But then, the next time I’d phone up to moan about something or other, he’d say it again. “Wynford, how many times do I have to tell you? The trouble with you is you keep forgetting that you’re a genius.”

And gradually, over the years, I came to accept what Bryn was saying. I am a genius! And this is the miracle, once I realised that I was a genius, I realised that everyone else are geniuses too. We’re all different. We’re all unique. And we all have an unique contribution to make to life’s rich tapestry.

So, I'm OK as I am today. I am perfect in every way. When I practise that - accepting me as I am not as I or someone else wants me to be - all my problems are over. Simple isn't it?

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